Minimum Safe Distance

I'm Riff. I'm a writer for a popular online game called Kingdom of Loathing. This is my blog. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

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Wed Feb 23
Marty: “All right, well, my primitive medieval knowledge of technology may have adapted pretty well to robotics, but I dunno a damn thing about computers. What’s it do, Phil?”Phil: “It will allow you to view various areas of the city through surveillance cameras we have installed, and transmit your voice to the people and robots in battle.”Marty: “You mean… I won’t have to actually fight in the battle? I can stay up here and just watch? Oh thank you thank you thank you thank you…”Phil: “I mean Billy will, because he is good at video games, and you don’t know a damn thing about computers.”Marty: “Oh. Well, shit.”Phil: “It also dispenses a soft-serve ice cream which, being a robot, I cannot eat, but Janet assures me it’s delicious.”

Marty: “All right, well, my primitive medieval knowledge of technology may have adapted pretty well to robotics, but I dunno a damn thing about computers. What’s it do, Phil?”

Phil: “It will allow you to view various areas of the city through surveillance cameras we have installed, and transmit your voice to the people and robots in battle.”

Marty: “You mean… I won’t have to actually fight in the battle? I can stay up here and just watch? Oh thank you thank you thank you thank you…

Phil: “I mean Billy will, because he is good at video games, and you don’t know a damn thing about computers.”

Marty: “Oh. Well, shit.”

Phil: “It also dispenses a soft-serve ice cream which, being a robot, I cannot eat, but Janet assures me it’s delicious.”

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