Minimum Safe Distance

I'm Riff. I'm a writer for a popular online game called Kingdom of Loathing. This is my blog. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

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Fri Feb 18
Bolt Head: “AAAARRRGH!”Guy: “Calm down, my old friend! You recognize me, non? We fought the robots together?”Bolt Head: “Uhhhrg?”Guy: “You remember Voldo, do you not?”Bolt Head: “Vuhduh?”Guy: “Le homme with ze mask? And ze claws? Hisses a lot?”Bolt Head: “Claw! Vuhduh!”Keith: “Man, when he said ‘not very articulate’ he was vastly understating it. The melty-head guy from The Goonies was better-spoken.”Hairbrush Santa: “Ho ho ho! Better keep your voice down, kid, something tells me you don’t want him to hear ya talkin’ that way.”Guy: “So what do you say, eh? You want to rejoin ze psychos and smash robots and kill people again?”Bolt Head: “KILL! ARRRRRGH!”Guy: “I assume that ees a ‘yes’.”Cindy: “Oh god, we are so boned.”Applepig: “Oink.”

Bolt Head: “AAAARRRGH!”

Guy: “Calm down, my old friend! You recognize me, non? We fought the robots together?”

Bolt Head: “Uhhhrg?”

Guy: “You remember Voldo, do you not?”

Bolt Head: “Vuhduh?”

Guy: “Le homme with ze mask? And ze claws? Hisses a lot?”

Bolt Head: “Claw! Vuhduh!”

Keith: “Man, when he said ‘not very articulate’ he was vastly understating it. The melty-head guy from The Goonies was better-spoken.”

Hairbrush Santa: “Ho ho ho! Better keep your voice down, kid, something tells me you don’t want him to hear ya talkin’ that way.”

Guy: “So what do you say, eh? You want to rejoin ze psychos and smash robots and kill people again?”

Bolt Head: “KILL! ARRRRRGH!”

Guy: “I assume that ees a ‘yes’.”

Cindy: “Oh god, we are so boned.”

Applepig: “Oink.”

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