Minimum Safe Distance

I'm Riff. I'm a writer for a popular online game called Kingdom of Loathing. This is my blog. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

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Tue Feb 15
Marty: “Okay, the tracker thing seems to be working. It looks like they’re heading east.”Cindy: “Guardbot, I can’t believe you had the foresight to plant a tracking device on that ear guy.”Guardbot: “I didn’t! I just accidentally dropped my wristwatch in his soup!”Marty: “What does a robot need with a wristwatch?”Guardbot: “I am a very fashionable man!”Marty: “All right, well, I’ve installed a receiver for our satellite system thingy in Guardbot, so you should be able to track that guy for as long as he’s, err, in possession of the watch.”Guardbot: “You mean until he poops?”Marty: “…Yes.”Cindy: “All right, I’d better get going, then. Good luck with the fortifications, Marty.”Marty: “Yeah. You be careful, okay? Come back safe.”Applepig: “Oink.”

Marty: “Okay, the tracker thing seems to be working. It looks like they’re heading east.”

Cindy: “Guardbot, I can’t believe you had the foresight to plant a tracking device on that ear guy.”

Guardbot: “I didn’t! I just accidentally dropped my wristwatch in his soup!”

Marty: “What does a robot need with a wristwatch?”

Guardbot: “I am a very fashionable man!”

Marty: “All right, well, I’ve installed a receiver for our satellite system thingy in Guardbot, so you should be able to track that guy for as long as he’s, err, in possession of the watch.”

Guardbot: “You mean until he poops?”

Marty: “…Yes.”

Cindy: “All right, I’d better get going, then. Good luck with the fortifications, Marty.”

Marty: “Yeah. You be careful, okay? Come back safe.”

Applepig: “Oink.”

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