Minimum Safe Distance

I'm Riff. I'm a writer for a popular online game called Kingdom of Loathing. This is my blog. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

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Wed Feb 9
Guardbot: “Don’t you worry about a thing, Guardbot 3351 will protect you humans from the psychos! I’ll burn them all with fire! PCHOOOOOOOO”Cindy: “Jesus fucking Christ! Who the fuck gave Guardbot flamethrowers?!”Marty: “He wouldn’t leave me alone until I made him a weapon.”Cindy: “So you gave him the ability to spray fire everywhere? I wouldn’t trust him with a wiffle-ball bat!”Marty: “Chill out — it’s not fire, it’s orange Kool-Aid.”

Guardbot: “Don’t you worry about a thing, Guardbot 3351 will protect you humans from the psychos! I’ll burn them all with fire! PCHOOOOOOOO”

Cindy: “Jesus fucking Christ! Who the fuck gave Guardbot flamethrowers?!”

Marty: “He wouldn’t leave me alone until I made him a weapon.”

Cindy: “So you gave him the ability to spray fire everywhere? I wouldn’t trust him with a wiffle-ball bat!”

Marty: “Chill out — it’s not fire, it’s orange Kool-Aid.”

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